April 14, 2009

Pancake Freak Out

Yesterday, I made pancakes for breakfast. It didn't take long and I called the boys in to eat.

Graeden and Jett came. They were messing around and name calling and hitting and being naughty in general. We had a little fiasco and I wanted to eat in peace, so I locked them out of the house. They were left on the deck outside our eating nook. I only had 3 conditions that they had to abide by before they'd be allowed to come back in the house.

#1 - they needed to apologize for their ill behavior
#2 - they needed to be happy
#3 - they needed to sing me a song

So, I was able to eat while they screamed and cried. I didn't feel too bad...except Jett was in his standard potty training attire (naked) and it was chilly out. I called for Elliott to come down and eat. Graeden refused to comply with my request and he (barefoot) went to find another way into the house (basement door). I was surprised that Elliott didn't let him in. I called Elliott again to come for breakfast. While Graeden was gone, I let Jett in but put him in the mud room sink until he could sing me a song. What's funny or terrible or sad is that Jett is often "trapped" in the high chair or sink or where ever I put him because he "thinks" that he can't get out. He really can and I work with him on helping him to realize that he really can get out or down. I kind of like being able to contain him but I also want him to know that he has quite a bit of power and can help himself.

Anyway, about this time, I was annoyed that Elliott wasn't coming for breakfast and went to find him. I opened the door to the basement and saw that the light was off, so I headed upstairs. The play room was empty. His bedroom was empty. I started to panic. Where was he? How long had it been since I'd seen him? 20 minutes? I didn't know. I raced through the house and checked the bathtubs to make sure he hadn't drowned. Then I calmed myself and systematically searched the entire house, room by room and under each bed. I was going crazy. I went outside and called to Graeden to see if he knew where Elliott was. He said he was in the basement. Nope, not there. I even went down to check because he could have been there playing with the light off and not answering me...

Many thoughts ran through my mind. I was committed to finding him before I called 911. I wanted a body. I was pretty sure he was in the house. I just didn't know where and I was terrified. My spirits were dejected with each empty room and each empty hiding spot. Pancakes are his favorite breakfast and it is extremely unusual for him to ignore a call to come and eat them. I tried to prepare myself for finding him dead. My emotions swirled around in my mind and it was VERY DIFFICULT for me to concentrate on my systematic search.

Just before I gave up and called anyway, I went into the garage. There Elliott was sitting in my car loading up on candy that he was not supposed to have.

I took the candy out of his hands, hugged him and sat on the chair in the family room and cried. I told him how much I love him and how I was frightened when I couldn't find him. He needs to tell me where he is going. No surprises. I thought he'd died. And Elliott's reaction ... Huh? Is there a problem? Am I not getting in trouble for sneaking candy? Where are the pancakes?

4 Riveting COMMENTS:

  1. Kakšna izkušnja! Me je med branjem kar stiskalo pri srcu. There are times when I feel overwhelmed with just two active kids around. Can't even imagine what it must be like to have a whole bunch...

  2. I would kill him. Hug him, tell him I'm happy he's okay, and then I would kill him. ;)

    In the mean time, I would probably burn the pancakes...

    Seriously, I'm very happy and thankful that everything worked out okay.

  3. That is crazy! That happened to me the other day. TJ went to a friend's house and didn't tell me. I thought he was out on his scooter, but he usually checks back in to tell me what he finds or sees. After 20 minutes I was panicking. I didn't call 911, I called his two dads. I wasn't going to call 911 until I had checked every possible place first. I checked four neighbors before finding him! I think he cried more than I did! So yeah. .. and that isn't the first time! He went to the high school in Cedar and played soccer with the soccer team in bare feet and snow on the ground!

  4. I hate that feeling! I have had it a few times, myself. I think that any of us who have more than 3 kids can understand how easy it is to "lose" one. Ugh. It is such a horrible feeling. I'm so sorry you had to go through it. Hope it's the last time. ;~)
    Having never experienced the death of one of my children, I can't imagine the extent of horror and grief you must have been feeling as you searched for him!


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