January 30, 2010

Heaps of Paper

For some reason (well I think it was meant to be), our internet wasn't working today. I spent all day sorting through papers. Recycling. Recycling. Recycling. We moved over 14 months ago and still have 6 boxes stacked in our office waiting to find a place in our home. The great news is that we used to have 10 boxes, so really I made some great progress today. And the side bonus is that I can actually see the top of my desk.

Nine years ago, I was loving college. Loving my classes. Loving my friends. And I loved writing. I found this beauty this afternoon and reminisced about this night and so many others...

A Toast To My Pal Erin:

The two boys questioned each other,
"Hey! You an' me? You an' me?"
As they surrounded you with dancing grooves.
It's all bump and grind, lacking the sublime.

The typically timid lawyer guy stopped his gyration
When you demanded, "what are you doing?"

His twinkling eyes shifted from you,
To his cohort, and then back at you with confidence.
Over the pounding bass Legal Weasel blurted out,
"I'm the Engergizer Bunny, an' I got the gift that keeps on givin'!"
Your eyebrows raised in disbelief. "Are you for real?"

Erin Parkinson,
756-6508
May all your Friday nights
Be full of memories to laugh about
And cry over.

January 28, 2010

Laugh Out Loud

Three stories. All today. Smiles and laughs all the way around. It's been good.

1. This morning Jett said our family prayer before Tymon left for work. The best part was that he prayed thanks for Graeden's dinosaur pajamas....and "especially that the dinos don't ever come out [of them]." I think Heavenly Father was laughing, too. 

2. On my way into the office I stopped behind a semi-truck at a traffic signal. Someone had taken the liberty to write in the dirt on the back of the trailer: More Taxes, Please!

3. And for the grand finale......I was talking with my brother Brett at the office today about some recent health concerns that have come up in our family. My father was just diagnosed with diabetes in November...perhaps it's still in the pre-diabetes stage. My 37 year old brother was diagnosed with full on diabetes a week or so before that. My mother has been insulin-dependent for the last several years. I had a physical this month and some lab tests done and my doctor told me that my blood sugar levels are slightly elevated...like pre-diabetes elevated. I need to lose 10-15 pounds and exercise and maybe I can control it. What?! A diet?! That's a 4-letter-word in my vocabulary.  I do NOT do diets.

I checked the American Diabetes Association's website to find out how to control pre-diabetes with diet instead of medication. And what did I find? Yeah, cut out carbs...they just elevate your blood sugar levels. Eat your veggies except not potatoes. Potatoes are bad. And by the way, fat isn't good and too much protein isn't great, either. Uh, yeah, so what's left? So the laugh out loud part in all of this is that when my loving brother was counseling me that I shouldn't starve myself that my cut off answer (due to another interruption) was that,
"I'm not starving myself. I'm just not eating..." 
He laughed the rest of the afternoon about that.

So, this is what really leaves me scratching my head: 80% of people with pre-diabetes are overweight. I'm 5 feet and 6.75 inches tall and a size 6. The plan to get my blood sugar levels at a decent level are the same for someone who is 50 pounds heavier than me. That doesn't make sense to me. Yes, I have some weight to lose. I still have Evan's birth weight (I lost Jocelyn's). After I lose those 15 pounds, then I'll weigh the same as I did in junior high and high school and I'll still be a size 6. A thinner 6, yes, but still a 6.


And the grief sets in. All the stages are there.

Shock and Denial: That lab test must have been wrong! My blood is fine. My doctor doesn't know what she's talking about. I'm going to get another opinion from a naturopath. They don't push drugs for all that ails like medical doctors. (I stopped by the store on the way home from the doctor and bought a glucose tester. I have tested my blood 20 times in the last 10 days. Yup, it's elevated.)

Pain and Guilt: Candy has been the love of my life. I've been overloading my pancreas for years with lots of delicious carbs and plenty of sweet gummy bears and sour patch kids. I did this to myself. I'm going to have a few Jelly Bellys and call it good.

Anger and Bargaining: What?! I'm not so overweight! Everybody else with diabetes 2 is fat. Don't tell me to lose weight Dr. X when you are obviously carrying a few more pounds than I am. Yeah, I'll go to the gym an extra day each week and stop eating anything that tastes good...just don't put me on any medication.

Depression, Reflection, Loneliness: I can't eat anything. I'm hungry all the time. Maybe that's positive. I have been wanting to lose weight anyway. Now the doctor has validated the need to do it.

The Upward Turn: I'll find a great new cook book...maybe take some culinary classes to learn how to make new pancreatic-friendly foods.

Reconstruction and Working Through: Hey, I love salad and can also eat pretty much all the squash I can handle. The boys loved the hard boiled and deviled eggs that we've been making. I just cleaned out the grocery store of Bob's Red Mill grains and ground flax seed. Whole grain carbs aren't so bad as the simple ones...

Acceptance and Hope: The test was accurate. Genetics got me. It is what it is and I hope to be able to turn things around.

January 26, 2010

Eternal Optimism

For one week I've started a blog post countless times...in my head. Each time, I think of a clever title and then a first line or maybe two to start it out. It's always funny and a real crowd pleaser. I love that. It's just the transition that gets a bit trickier and the story isn't happy for me and then I get angry. Really angry. Crying angry. This trial isn't the end of the world. Although at times, it seems like it. So, for now the post is on hold until I can muster up some of Natalie's eternal optimism.

January 24, 2010

Calm

My boy
Tired
and
Sobbing
Screaming
On a tirade

Me driving
Cranky
Ticked off
Stop
the
Noise!

My Pilot
Love you
Beautiful
Sound system
Blasting

Turning up
Jay-Z
Keys
Drowning out
Tears
Shouts
Insults

There's nothing you can't do
Make you feel brand new
Smile spreading
Mood changing
Calm at last

January 23, 2010

Fun Challenge #1 - Ugly Faces

Molly's having fun this year and we're jumping in on the action.
Here are our funny ugly faces in the Have More Fun Challenge #1. You can join us, too!


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January 21, 2010

Secret Prayers

I forgot to mention the best thing that Jett's teacher mentioned to me after class yesterday. At snack time, the kids had just started eating and Jett wanted to say a blessing on the food. It's great that he is yet unaffected by what others do. His teacher told him that he could say a prayer by himself like one of the other teachers at the school does, but that it's a private thing.

And it brings to my mind how inconsistent I am in my prayers for the Lord's blessing on my food. We always say them when we are at home. When I am at the office, I don't know that I've ever said one. I eat at my desk (we don't really have a lunchroom besides the empty classroom) so no one else is around and would "see" me pray. Sometimes, my brother is there and we grew up praying so that's no big deal if he sees me. Maybe I don't pray there because we are constantly snacking and praying each time would really add up to quite a bit of time since we'd be praying for each bite of food. When we're in restaurants, occasionally we say the quick prayer and most of the time we say nothing. It's the inconsistency that is getting to me.

I think I'd feel better if we just came up with a plan and stuck with it. Either we pray in front of everyone or we commit to doing it in the car before eating out or we do it in front of people or whatever. We just need to decide what to do and then do that. As for lunch and school, obviously my boys could use some direction. They've already faced the peer pressure about not praying...so arming them with practical tools would be wonderful.

What do you and your family do?

January 20, 2010

So EX-CITE-TING!


Jett was thrilled to start school today. He's been wanting a place to go like his brothers for a long time now. I've enrolled him at a gym that does preschool classes. Part of the program includes a 30 minute gymnastics class every school day. Yay! Jett loves it and can't wait till Friday when he goes again.



This could be the makings of a great career as a gymnast. First step: tumbling. Second step: Olympics.

January 15, 2010

Sponge

After dropping off Elliott at school this morning, the following takes place:
Jett: Mom, how do you spell car?
Me: C-A-R
Jett: Mom, how do you spell gas?
Me: G-A-S
Jett: Mom, how do you spell house?
Me: Jett, why do you care? You won't remember how to spell it, will you? How do you spell car?
Jett: Uh...I dunno.
Me: How do you spell gas?
Jett: Uh...
Me: See? I'll tell you how to spell things when you remember how to spell.
Jett: Uh... uh... C-A-R?

What?! Seriously? Jett is three and a half. And he actually was paying attention?



Jett spent some time with Ammon (almost 3) and my friend Amber yesterday while I was working. They happened to go to the doctor and Amber relayed to me that Ammon started talking about being born at the doctor's (well not with this foot doctor ha ha). Jett added that he came from Heavenly Father and that Michelle had him in the hospital and then he came to live with our family.

Surprise #1: Jett remembered Michelle's name and produced on his own with NO prompting in an appropriate situation. (Amber didn't know Michelle's name until she told me the story and I confirmed it.)
Surprise #2: Jett is demonstrating that he understands what it means to be adopted.
Surprise #3: Jett was actually paying attention when we look at a photo of him as a newborn and Michelle.

Wow. He's like a sponge...just soaking it in and then one day he surprise wrings it all out.

January 14, 2010

Jury Duty

I have been called to jury duty twice ... or maybe three times. The first was just after I moved away from college...so I was ineligible. The second....and this one seems hazy so maybe it didn't happen...I was called a few years ago and had something else going on so I got out of it.

I was called to do jury duty this week. And there were just a few great things about this time around. I wouldn't have to get up at the crack of dawn to take a bus into Seattle like my brother had to do a while back when he served in the federal court. My courthouse is 3 minutes away from my house. Parking is a non-issue in our city. Amber was free to watch my kids. (I should've cut a deal for her to watch them while I gave her my $10 a day pay. ha ha ha.) But truly the greatest is that I was excited to be able to take part in the American justice system. I won't get to sit with these folks this week, though.



I called in to hear my instructions last night and found that no jurors were needed. So, this ends another installment of my "I don't get to be on a jury" stories. I'm not even sure why I want to do it. There's an off chance that I could be called on a case like my dad a few years ago. The trial lasted weeks. That wasn't fun for him.

And I'm not sure that I would have been chosen if had even made it past the initial interview, though. This courthouse is mainly for traffic violators. And well, I'm pretty sure no defense attorney would want to choose a traffic safety instructor who's been hit by a drunk driver to sit on their jury. Maybe next time...

January 11, 2010

One Year Three Months Thirteen Days

Evan spent one year, three months and thirteen days with our family. This photo, while taken at the Labor Day picnic 2008, could have been from a meeting with God....just imagine....



Heavenly Father: Evan, it's time to enter the next phase of your life.
Evan: Whatchu talkin' about?
Tymon: Uh, I dunno...maybe...
Elliott: (burst into tears)
Heavenly Father: Okay, I'll give you two weeks.

Today, Jocelyn is just the right age and size. She gives just the best hugs. Developmentally, she does just the right things to remind us of Evan.



Tomorrow, Jocelyn will physically age beyond Evan. How backward that seems. Yet it is what it is. What a blessing Jocelyn has been for our family. She helps us confront and push through our grief. The resurrection has never been more real or meant so much to me as it does now. I'm grateful that this life is not the end. There is more. I can hardly wait until we will be together forever. Someday.

January 10, 2010

Three Days

Thursday afternoon, I picked up my kids from my friend Amber's house. She opened the door, took one look at me and said, "Did you get your hair cut? It's uh...yeah, did you pay for that?"



And my dear sweet husband didn't even notice. I didn't blog about it and clue him in. For three days, I waited and nothing.... Then Saturday night, Tymon and I were at the fridge getting some juice to drink, he looked at me and noticed my hair. On his own.

It was so hard to keep silent for three days. I also felt like if I didn't have anything nice to say about this girl who'd just graduated beauty school and was only on the second day of her new job, then I shouldn't say anything at all. It doesn't bother me so much that she told me that I should go home and wash my hair and style it like normal and if it still looked choppy then I could come back and they'd fix it...What really eats me up is that I said, "okay" to that. Like why didn't I just tell the girl that I wasn't satisfied and that the other lady could fix it? The colleague was on her 4th client in the 60 plus minutes that it took the rookie to do my simple style. It's too bad we can't rewind time and rework our actions. It seems like the best things to say come to mind after the fact. Phooey.

January 6, 2010

Marbles



Why is it that my best marble picker upper is my smallest child? It's almost as if she doesn't realize that we are so diligent about picking them up and putting them away for her sake. Nearly every day she finds some hiding somewhere and always finds me to give them to. Last night she was especially cute giving me marbles every few minutes (Graeden had thrown some into my bedroom a couple of nights prior). I turned them over to Elliott who put them away with our marble game. He didn't know what to make of Jocelyn finding new marbles the entire evening.


 
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